Mind Your Language

Well everyone knows how incredibly hard I work and so it may come as a shock that I managed to squeeze in a conversation with my Turkish friend Ali. He was giving me a lesson in how to chat up women (!) in his native tongue and not wanting to be rude I listened intently....

So here is what you do....when you see a nice young lady that you want to impress in Turkey you can use the time old work "Munara" that will really impress her as it means you are a lovely woman....you can then follow up with "Malaka" which is term of endearment...and if you really want to get into her Turkish gusset you can use the word "Kavurakyas" (pronounced 'cover -upyer -arse')....

Now in this age of forward thinking you would think that would be very good and within minutes the young lady would be introducing you her grandfather and the town rapist....BUT..BEWARE....

Apparently the word Munara can mean you have a large pussie...Malaka can mean Wanker and Kavurakyas can mean you are a stroppy git....so you are really saying your a stroppy bitch and a wanker with a pussie the size of the Empire State building.....aint foreign languages wonderful.

Why we dont all speak English I will never know...all the other languages cant really be proper words can they...they dont sound right, I am sure foreigners do it just to show off and make us feel small.

They should remember who had an Empire.....oh and we had a Gaumont and an Odeon too I think?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UlFu6668DCc&NR=1